It’s been a while!

published on: 08/15/17 8:47 PM

So, it’s almost been one year since I last wrote a blog! Makes me think about the concept of time. On one hand, it seems to pass quickly, but then on the other hand when reflecting back time can seem to have passed at a much slower pace. The way we remember some of our experiences can also vary; feeling so real in the moment and then so surreal when you reflect afterwards.

I met a 9 year old boy on the train this weekend, and got chatting to him about moving up a year at school in September – he said ‘time flies when you get older’, and he really meant it! I was like ‘but you’re only 9!’. I was surprised that at from such a young age the notion of time going quickly is being believed to be true by children…so young!  Of course there will be many factors contributing to this such as societal and cultural pressures and expectations.

Living in the world we do, it can be extremely challenging to escape such expectations. We all get lost in this from time to time (no pun intended!), or for some of us most of our lives. Getting caught up in being ‘who’ and ‘what’ we think we are ‘suppose’ to be, or ‘should’ be we lose touch of who we actually ‘are’.  All these layers get added from external places that sometimes we can become so far removed from our true selves…our authentic selves!

When this happens we may experience depression, anxiety, a sense of being ‘lost’, anger, frustration, generally feeling dissatisfied with life, our relationships, work, activities we undertake… it might feel like something is missing. A sense of there is more to life than this!?!

Imagine how it might feel to connect to your true self? Getting to know yourself again, or for the first time. The most important relationship that we need to experience in order to feel true inner peace and happiness is the relationship with ourselves. This then provides a foundation for meaningful and satisfying relationships with others. Relationships can then be based on ‘wanting’ to be with someone, not ‘needing’ to be with them – they can come from a place of unconditional love and detachment (meant in the terms of not ‘clinging’, or trying to find your happiness through the other person).

My own journey and those of others around me, both personal and professional relationships have inspired me to share more and write more! It might just be one sentence that speaks to you and that sentence might be just what you need in that moment, to help you along your journey. It might sew a seed, or it might help to confirm something for you. The kind of topics I Imagine I will be writing about are around,  self love, connecting to your true selves, obstacles holding you back, mindfulness, removing fear of judgment, making decisions, reducing stress, coping with change…… and so much more, so keep an eye out for future blogs.

I also welcome your thoughts on this blog as well as  ideas and recommendations for future topics, please leave a comment below or alternatively – email me.

Until then, take care.



4 replies on “It’s been a while!”

Thank you sharing this blog Sukhi i agree inner peace and happiness is a journey personal to each and every one of us, these days the “busy life” takes over, what we forget is how much of this busy life is spent doing things we don’t want to be doing, isn’t life itself too short to be caught up in things that really don’t make us happy. But here we are as second/third generation Asians with cultural beliefs that really still won’t allow us to be free ! And having to instead of make peace with ourselves and what we want we are trying to make peace with beliefs that are irrational !

Whenever we as asIans think we have moved forward with things when we look around we really see there is still so much more work to be done!

“The most important relationship that we need to experience in order to feel true inner peace and happiness is the relationship with ourselves.” Very true and I echo this as this is true in my case and it feels great to put myself first, and knowing what makes me happy even if it is to come out of the relationship that meant a lot to me but if the committment is not there from both sides then the relationship is meaningless and finding my own way out from it is like discovering my true stronger and independent self. It feels great!

Thanks for sharing this Sham. I think you’ve touched on something really significant here; taking the risk to leave a relationship to connect to your truer self (embracing the uncertainty this can bring), versus staying in a relationship that may have felt safe and familiar but one which may have prevented your growth. It takes great courage and self belief to take this step and by doing so it seems to have opened up new doors to self discovery and inner strength.

Thanks Hardip for highlighting how culture can potentially cause conflict and prevent individuals from being their true selves, perhaps making compromises with themselves. Cultural identity can be quite complex when we take into account what this means when broken down; social class, religion, country of birth, ethnicity, race, before we even add age and gender – all of which may bring particular expectations. It would be interesting to explore what is it that assists individuals to find their inner peace and sense of freedom within their given culture. What helps to empower them to make the right choices for themselves… or are these still on some unconscious level influenced by cultural beliefs?

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